Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Jenna Bush gets engaged

Jenna Bush, 25, President and Laura Bush's daughter, is marrying Henry Hager, 28, a former White House aide who used to work with Karl Rove.

LSB: I usually reject this kind of "news" for the blog, but I have heard one too many on-air, air-heads speculating about the possibility of a White House wedding. (I thought one particularly pathetic bitch was gonna orgasm on camera, as she sounded so excited to be talking about this.)

OF COURSE this will be a White House wedding - anyone who has ever watched network television knows that when a show isn't doing well in the ratings the writers add a wedding (or a baby) to spike the ratings. Well, have you seen this President's rating lately? And since an out-of-wedlock baby wouldn't exactly help the wingnut cause, a wedding was selected. 2008 is an election year, so the electorate will need to be repeatedly hit over the head that the Republican Party is (REALLY! I'M NOT KIDDING!) the "Family Values" party.

Besides, does anyone really think Bush wants his legacy to be Iraq and his lasting image to be that of swaggering on the flight deck in front of the Mission Accomplished banner? No, it would be better to be reminded that he is a husband and father by holding up his drunkard daughter as she staggers down the aisle. Jenna is being used as the sacrificial "virgin" in this melodrama and, of course, the stooge selected to marry her is the Dark Lord's protégé. I can't wait to see the ugly bridesmaid dress Jenna picks out for Ann Coulter. Will Jeff Gannon or Cpl. Matthew Sanchez (a.k.a Rod Majors) be the best man?

Cynical? Moi?

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